Merriam-Webster defines a friend as:

one attached to another by affection or esteem

but I don’t think a dictionary can really fully define a friend.

Thinking back over my life, over the many people I’ve know and the many I’ve called friends, it is so funny to see how the people have flowed in and out of my life. Like water. Friends have helped in times of trouble, and yes, on some occasions friends have hurt me in ways that only friends can.

But most of all, as I think back, I realize how the friends have come and gone at the right times. Some people have entered my life, as friends, when I most needed them. Those people have left me, and even though I may not have wanted to admit it at the time, their departure from my life was truly God’s way of giving me His best.

Just think… most of my biggest and best life changes have come after losing friends.

It was because I lost a friend that I decided to study education.

It was because I lost a friend that I moved overseas and served on the mission field.

It was because I lost a friend that I decided to run a 5k, which evolved into a 10k, which evolved into a half marathon, and I’m still thinking about running a full marathon next fall.

Friendship is so fluid. I’m so thankful that God has taken those friends away when He did, because what he gave me in return was so much better.

Last Sunday I had the opportunity to go to a Royals baseball game with my new friends. It was tons of fun!

First, one gal named Margy received four free tickets from a friend (who got them from work). She offered me one ticket, and when I hesitated, basically insisted that I take that ticket. Because of her, I didn’t have to pay for the ticket or the parking! Wow!!

More wow: these free tickets were RIGHT BEHIND THE DUGOUT!

Way cool!

This is Terri, the gal I sat by for the majority of the game. She was super nice and we had a great time chatting and getting to know each other.

I forgot to bring my camera so I had to rely on my cell phone camera. Definitely a major regret, because this would have been a fantastic time to have a camera! It was still fun, though. The Royals really fought hard!

These four free tickets were close to the dugout, but our group was larger than four (maybe a dozen or so?), so the rest of the group bought $20 tickets that were up on the top level, and we walked around and circulated between the two locations. Luckily, Kauffman Stadium doesn’t really have a bad seat! During roughly the third through the sixth inning, Terri and I went up to the “upper” seats and let two of our friends enjoy a few innings in the “lower” seats.

Up high, but still not too hard to see!

Towards the end of the game, I walked up right up behind the dugout to take photographs. I only got a couple of shots before an usher came up and harassed me about standing too close to the dugout.

The Royals lost, but that didn’t take away from the fun. I really enjoyed the game, the ball park, and spending time with these friends!!

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.

Going to this new church, meeting new people, visiting new groups… it seems like a big deal to me.

When I visited the young singles group at this church, I was very disappointed by the lack of hospitality. I received a couple of replies to emails I sent, but I have only received ONE text message that was not initiated by myself.

I have the distinct feeling that I’m not wanted in this group, and that hurts. They have all made it clear to me that during the week, they are sending text messages to each other, following each other on Facebook, and so forth. But not to me.

I am not sure if they are intending to send this negative message or if they are just lazy, but it doesn’t really matter. I’ve never had the opportunity to be involved in a healthy Christian group with people my own age, and I’m a bit sad that this one won’t work either.

Every now and then I will see someone at church, who I recognize from this singles group, who will say hello and even ask me for my email address and promise to email me that week. But they never do.

I went to another group, though, a larger group for adults in general, not just a particular age group or demographic. This group was so different, and it’s almost hard to believe that this is the same church. This group has gone overboard to make me feel welcome. I’ve been welcomed into a smaller group-with-a-group of young and (mostly) single adults. I’ve received emails. I’ve been friended on Facebook. I even had someone stop by my house unannounced! This group celebrated with me when I ran my half marathon. They search for me on Sunday mornings.

I never before realized just how important hospitality is within a church. I speak from experience, now. I know that I want to go where I’m wanted. I know there is a certain human element in that- that we should not desire approval from other people- but very few people can persist in a place where they are not wanted. I’m not one of them. That was why I left my previous church.

Every now and then, when I run into someone from the singles group, I feel a twinge of sadness. I do wish I could experience a healthy Christian group of my peers. But the key word in that is “healthy”. I’m not sure this particular group is a “healthy” group. Obviously it is working for at least a few people- that’s why the group exists. But it will never work for me.

I am thankful, then, that this other, “older” adults group has been a place for me. I am thankful that they welcome me and desire my company. Most of all, I’m thankful for them. I’m thankful that they call me a friend. It’s easy to forget the huge ways our day-to-day actions can change eternity.

Today I read about this: a filmmaker who claims to have discovered the same nails that were used to crucify Jesus. I can only sigh.

I wish people could see that it’s not about the nails! The nails are just like the Shroud of Turin or the Holy Grail. Are these the same artifacts that were used in relation with Jesus? Maybe. Maybe not. Ultimately it doesn’t matter, because the nails and the Shroud and the Grail will all pass away. They’re all just physical material things. One fire, earthquake, or some other natural disaster, and they could be destroyed and lost forever.

Jesus won’t go away.

When the nails are gone, and the Shroud is gone, and the Grail is gone, Jesus won’t go anywhere. The presence of those material objects has absolutely no impact on the presence (or absence) of Jesus.

Forget about the nails. Forget about the Shroud. Forget about the Grail. Forget about everything material that may or may not somehow be related to Jesus’ time on earth. It doesn’t matter.

All that matters is Jesus.

Things are good today.

A lot of struggles are working themselves out this week. Mountains are becoming molehills, so to speak. And I feel good.

I’m becoming more and more thankful for the new friends I’ve met recently, bowling and at the Mexican pot luck dinner. I’m not sure how to describe it. It’s nice to be welcomed and accepted for just who I am- no more, no less.

Yesterday went well. I went to church, to this new group, and… it went well. Not sure how else to put it.

A couple of the people in the group remembered that I was running a race last Saturday, and they asked about it. That was really nice. Then they invited me to a “bowling” night last night, which I accepted.

It was a little challenging to bowl, only a day after running a half marathon. My legs were just not into it. On my first game, I was only able to bowl 84, and on the second game it dropped to 66, just because my legs were not cooperating. I bowed out after that.

It was fun, though, to meet these people and talk to them and get to know them. They were all very kind and welcoming. Some of them were really into bowling, which was a bit surprising. I mean I’ve gone bowling several times in my life, but it has never been more than an occasional diversion. Bowling alleys are filled with smoke and people drinking beer. Bowling alley food is covered in grease and salt. Ugh.

Not that it was at all a bad experience. Like I said, I enjoyed meeting people and I appreciated how kind they were. It was actually kinda funny… I pushed myself through the evening, though like I said, my legs were not cooperating. By the end of the evening, my feet were just throbbing. I got through it, though, with a reasonable amount of energy. But when I got in the car, it was like someone had flipped a switch- I realized that I was just exhausted and starving!

I stopped at a Burger King on the way home to grab a bite to eat- I know it’s not the healthiest option, but when you’re that hungry, almost anything will do! The skies had opened up and there was a fierce thunderstorm raging outside. But it was a good night.